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OLD MAN TELLS FUNNIEST JOKE EVER!

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Old man tells joke about irs and gambleling. Like and subscribe
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homerun buster (3 hours ago)
A string walked into a bar and the bartender says"get out you are to young" the string goes out, ties himself up, and goes back in. The bartender then asks,"arent you the same string that just came in?" And the string replies," im a frayed knot"
Yellow Pete (12 hours ago)
That was rubbish
Skrt Drt (16 hours ago)
There are 2 guys riding a horse, they are gonna stop by a river for water. Then a shark eats him
THAT is one of the BEST IRS jokes that I have ever heard!! Ha ha ha ha!
moth memes (20 hours ago)
i don't get it -Patrick
Diego Wagenaar (1 day ago)
Not funny boo booo !!!!!!!!!
rremy 101 (1 day ago)
TO LONG... I don’t get it
Crooked _ Snypz (1 day ago)
it was worth the wait
Darlene Frederick (1 day ago)
😂
It’s Nooberboy (1 day ago)
why is everyone telling jokes
murffy69 (1 day ago)
3:00 when i catch santa
raukris (1 day ago)
So, once upon a time in Mexico...
bg6b7bft (1 day ago)
Three old men were sitting around complaining. The first one said, "Every morning at 7 AM I get up to pee. It trickles out so slow it takes me fifteen minutes to empty my bladder." The second one said, "Oh yeah? Every morning at 6 AM I get up to poop. It takes me a full hour to do my business!" The third one said, "Oh yeah? Every morning at 7:30 I piss like a racehorse, and at 7:45 I shit like a pig." The first two men look at each other and, in unison scoff, "What's wrong with that?" "I don't wake up until 8."
Furthest Expert (1 day ago)
Not funny
x Rhenum x (1 day ago)
You my man are a great story lol that was entertaining.
Geoff Watts (1 day ago)
thx...it was good...
I was gonna be a doctor. But i didn't have the patients
bazinga (1 day ago)
LOL DIE FLIPPERWALDT GERSPUT
china no1 (1 day ago)
thank you for your share
thatsdandy (2 days ago)
I was already laughing at the false teeth part. Great joke!
TheHunter (2 days ago)
This Is from the movie "Desperado"
Lily Riffle (2 days ago)
Haha
So my wife asked me the other night where I would like to be buried..........apparently deep inside your sister was the wrong answer.
GDI (2 days ago)
He's not old! Fat people don't live long enough to become old
Mackenzie Harper (15 hours ago)
Stfu and go fucking die you worthless piece of shit!!!
John Knowles (2 days ago)
LMFAO 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Travis Ellis (2 days ago)
How did Venezuela provide light before candles? Electricity.
Steve Flath (3 hours ago)
well played, well played. (clapping is heard)
JohnnyBoy (2 days ago)
I have no idea what he’s saying
HENCHA #1 (2 days ago)
... Read more
Ted Forrester (2 days ago)
Old man? This guys like my age. Aw shit...
Dark Crystal (2 days ago)
So this dyslexic guy walks into a bra...
Matthew Renaud (3 days ago)
There once was a priest, a rabbi, and a little boy flying on a plane. Its a small little single engine plane and all of a sudden the engine starts spittin and sputtering, Then at once the engine completely cuts out. There is 2 parachutes on board so the rabbi looks at the priest and says “so, me and you got the parachutes right?” The priest then says “well, what about the little boy?” The Rabbi says “man, fuck the little boy!” All of a sudden the priest thinks to himself and his face turns bright as he says “do you think we have time?”
G Bae (3 days ago)
Whats an IRS.
Popey squirrel (2 days ago)
Tax collection
Chanze hall (3 days ago)
He's not old
Tony Yang (3 days ago)
This just some fat redneck trucker. This ain't funny. How is this even funny?
John Denti (3 days ago)
A woman goes to the drug store and tells the pharmacist that she wants some cyanide because she caught her husband having sex with another woman and she’s going to kill him. The druggist says that he can’t sell her cyanide so she reaches into her handbag and pulls out a photo of her husband having sex with the druggist’s wife. Now he says, “Well...l see you have a prescription!”
BikesOnOfficial (3 days ago)
There was a bus full of wives and then it crashed, and all the wives died. All the husband's cried for a week and stopped. However one man cried for 2 weeks and when he was asked why, he replied 'my wife missed the bus'
D1Gr8hansGraf (3 days ago)
What's the difference between a refrigerator and a homosexual? The refrigerator doesn't fart when you pull out the meat.
dilly dungus (3 days ago)
Wow 4,200 soyboy beta-cock dildo-licking cucks gave thumbs down. They must be CNN viewers.
dilly dungus (2 days ago)
Sound reasoning.
SkydiverClassC (3 days ago)
Or maybe it's just a tired old joke that everyone has heard before.
Joseph Hensel (3 days ago)
I wear diapers for 2 reasons Number 1 and number 2😂😂😂😂 I’m sorry,have a great day
Nate Lance (4 days ago)
That ending though! :D
Ken Lompart (4 days ago)
A man is sitting in a bar just staring at a full shot glass. After about an hour a tough guy across the bar walks over and says. look buddy this is a bar and in this bar men drink. The tough guy picks up the glass and downs it then the man starts to cry. The tough guy says pull yourself together pal I'll buy you another drink. The man says, that's not why I'm crying, this morning I lost my job then I caught my wife in bed with my best friend and my daughter ran off with a motorcycle gang then just when I was about to end it all you drank my poison.
TERRY CORVETTE (4 days ago)
A collie dog walks into a bar and the bartender says why the long face?
TERRY CORVETTE (4 days ago)
What??!!! Old man tell's a joke??? Damn... I am old enough to be his Daddy and that's not a joke.
Savage Beast (4 days ago)
Wasn't the funniest joke but decent
Opal Graham (4 days ago)
Good one. But I have heard this before.
Gage’z Gaming (4 days ago)
Damn that’s awesome LOL
GW H (4 days ago)
Good One 😂😂🤣🤣👍👍👍👍
Yaro's Car Hustle (4 days ago)
this is a remade joke from Tarantino's movie !!! Desperado
Nikush Jentilal (4 days ago)
I didn't find it funny like this comment
nixonsmateruby1 (4 days ago)
Here's a good joke for you.... British politics.
Ella M. (4 days ago)
Nah, the 2016-2020 US Presidency is a bigger a$$ joke
Shaira Star (4 days ago)
😂. I was too busy ready the comments to even watch the video! I have no idea what this joke is about
Michael F Kost (5 days ago)
Once upon a time in Mexico
Aeden Martinez (5 days ago)
How is this funny
W
CB Carper (5 days ago)
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
davisx2002 (5 days ago)
one of my favorites...I heard it about 20 years ago in Mississippi
Prince Bassa (5 days ago)
Lmao
Medic83 (5 days ago)
I've heard this joke a million times and it still kills me! 😂😂😂😂
sickass cant (5 days ago)
What did the teacher tell the dumb kids? Read more...
dgregory79 (5 days ago)
Stolen directly from the film DESPERADOS
Mike B (5 days ago)
Guy walks into the doctors office and says, "Doc I'm really not feeling well." Doc asks him what's going on so the guy tells him, "Well, I just have no energy, all my joints and bones ache and I have headaches and stomach aches all the time" The doctor says, "Well that's troubling, we're going to have to run a battery of tests, I'll need a urine sample, a stool sample and a sperm sample" Guy says, "Okay doc that's fine but I'm in kind of a rush, can I just leave my underwear"?
erick mike (5 days ago)
The joke that i can do in our own language and bet they'll love it... thank you sir...
Rizje (6 days ago)
😂
Everyone (6 days ago)
A man hears a knock on his door, he answers the door and sees a Snail sitting on his door step looking up at him. Without thinking the man picks up the Snail and throws it into a forest across the road and shuts the door Three months later, there's another knock on the door again and when the man opens it, he opens the door to the same Snail who in turn says "so what was that for?"
Jack Hack (6 days ago)
A priest, a rabbi, and a pastor walk into a bar. The bartender looks at them and says, "What is this, some kind of joke?"
sara cowles (6 days ago)
Good One!!
Dragonz St1ng (6 days ago)
confucius say, man who go to bed with itchy bum, wake up with smelly finger
John Vertúdazo (6 days ago)
He doesn’t look old at all
Memes (6 days ago)
A man walks into a bar and leans on the bar. He had a long day and after a few shots, the man was feeling great. He sees a sign on the wall that reads "The $10,000 Challenge" he stumbles to the sign and reads "Ask the bartender for more information." He stumbles back to the counter and says "Hey, what's this challenge all about?" Everyone in the bar stops talking and drinking and stares at the man. The bartender says "First, you must down a whole bottle of fire hot tequila, then, theres is an alligator out in the back with a loose tooth, pull the tooth. Lastly, there is a woman upstairs who has never felt an orgasm before." The man was feeling pumped. He took the challenge. He downed the whole bottle of whiskey. He had tears in his eyes and was extremely drunk. He then heads outback and all anyone can hear is screaming and growling and chaos. Eventually, the man comes back inside with bruises, cuts and his clothes are torn. He slowly heads upstairs for the last challenge. Later, he comes downstairs and says "I got the lady with the loose tooth."
akx (2 days ago)
He was so drunk that he raped the alligator instead.
Jim Lahey (4 days ago)
I don't get it either.
Ella M. (4 days ago)
I don’t get it. Someone explain plz?
Joseph (6 days ago)
Teacher ash’s for a sentence with the word fascinate. She calls on Mary I went to the zoo and was fascinated by the tigers teacher good Mary but I want fascinate sh calls on billy we went to see Star Wars and it was fascinating teacher good billy but I need fascinate. Little Johnny waving frantically teacher teacher having been burned by Johnny before she relents ok Johnny , he says my aunt Millie has a sweater with ten buttons but her TITSare so big she can only fasten eight Johnny was sent to the principal
Mega Melvin (6 days ago)
Red neck and his fat wife getting ready to have sex. She walks in with a Viagra, he says what's that for?something needs to help that limp noodle! He has a sack of flower. She asked what's that for? He replied have to find the wet spot with the flower and the sack is for your face so I can stay hard!😂😂😂
Mega Melvin (6 days ago)
What's the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chic pea? You never had a garbanzo bean on your face!😂😂😂😂🤣🤣
Mega Melvin (6 days ago)
What's the difference between a pizza delivery boy and a gynecologist? They both can smell it but can't eat it!
Only one like... That's just not fair for that one 😆
Mega Melvin (6 days ago)
Did you know before he died Michael Jackson got arrested in toysRus? He was blowing bubbles in the aisle!😂🤣😂🤣
tom ault (4 days ago)
are you sure that was before he died?
Mega Melvin (6 days ago)
I am a god fearing Catholic but stopped going to church because the priest became a pain in my ass!😂😂
Aidan Wahl (6 days ago)
This is the funniest joke evrr
owatahfuhlyem (6 days ago)
A hunter flies up to the northern wilds of Canada to hunt polar bear. He sets out from his camp and trudges around all day, finally spotting a polar bear about 200 yards off. He gets on his stomach, sneaks to within 150 yards, jumps up, and fires! Blam! He lowers his rifle to look for the bear. Not seeing it, he walks to where the bear was. Nothing. Suddenly he feels something tap his shoulder and turns around. It's the bear..two feet away, standing on its back legs, and staring down at him. The bear says, "Because you tried to kill me, you're going to do something disgusting to my body. On your knees." The hunter takes in the bear's yellow fangs and claws as long as knives and, given no choice, does the dirty deed. Afterwards, he returns to his camp in horror at what he did. As he thinks about it, he becomes angry, grabs his rifle, and says, "That bear's not going to get away with that". He tracks the bear, spots it and, sneaking within range, jumps up and shoots! Blam! Blam! He lowers his rifle. Not seeing the bear, he walks to where it was. Nothing. Then he feels a tap on his shoulder. He turns around and it's the bear again. The bear glares down at him and says, "For that, I'm going to do something disgusting to you..drop your pants and grab your ankles." Again the hunter takes in the bear's fangs and claws, and tearfully complies. Afterward, he crawls back to his tent and lies shamefully thinking about what happened. He becomes so angry he grabs his rifle, swearing "I'm going to murder that bear if it's the last thing I do!" The hunter goes out and stalks the bear, sneaking within 50 yards. He jumps up and empties his rifle at the bear! Blam! Blam! Blam! Blam! Blam! Blam! Blam! Blam! He runs to where the bear was and stops. Nothing! Then he feels a tap on his shoulder. He hangs his head and slowly turns around. Sure enough, it's the bear. The bear looks down at him and says softly, "You didn't come up here for the hunting, did you, buddy?"
owatahfuhlyem (6 days ago)
An American walked into a pub on the coast of Scotland, ordered a beer, and sat down at the counter. He noticed a burly Scot sitting nearby, sadly sipping a Guinness, and asked him if anything was wrong. The native turned to him and said: "Ach, lad, ye see this bonny counter in this pub? Ah planed it smooth as silk despite the splinters drawing blood from mah knuckles. Mah counters are in many a pub throughout Scotland. Do they call such a man 'MacPherson the Counter Maker'? Nae. Ye see yon fence 'round this pub? 'Tis a fine sturdy fence Ah made wi' the blisters on m' own hands. Mah fences are 'round all the pubs of this land. Do they call such a man 'MacPherson the Fence Builder'? Nae. Look yonder 'pon the coastline nearby. Do ye see tha' fair dock near the moors? Ah laid each board wi' the sweat off m' puir back, straight an' true, an' mah docks are known along the entire coast. Do they call such a man 'MacPherson the Dock Layer'? Nae. But Ah f*** one goat..."
owatahfuhlyem (6 days ago)
A lawyer and a blonde are sitting next to each other on the long flight from Los Angeles to New York. The lawyer leans over to the blonde, and asks if she would like to play a fun game. She just wants to take a nap, so she politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks. The lawyer persists, emphasizing that the game is really easy and a lot of fun. He explains, "I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer you pay me $5. Then, you ask me a question, and if I don't know the answer I pay you $5." Again she politely declines, and tries again to get some sleep. The lawyer, more determined than ever says, "Okay, if you don't know the answer you pay me $5, and if I don't know the answer I'll pay you $50," figuring that, since she's blonde, he'll easily win the match. His offer catches her attention and, figuring that there will be no end to this torment unless she plays, she agrees to the game. The lawyer asks the first question: "What's the distance from the Earth to the moon?" The blonde doesn't say a word. She reaches into her purse, pulls out a $5 bill and hands it to the lawyer. Now it's the blonde's turn. She asks the lawyer: "What goes up a hill with three legs, and comes down with four?" The lawyer looks at her with a pained expression as she turns again to the window. He takes out his laptop computer and searches all his references. He taps into the digital cell phone via infra-red wireless connection to his modem port, and searches the 'Net and the Library of Congress. Frustrated, he sends an e-mail all of his co-workers, clients, suppliers and friends. Then waits. No replies ... Nothing. Finally, after an hour or so, he wakes the blonde and grudgingly hands her a $50 bill. The blonde politely takes the $50 and turns away to get back to sleep. More than a little irritated, the lawyer wakes her again and asks, "Well, so what IS the answer?" Without a word, the blonde reaches into her purse, hands the lawyer $5, and goes back to sleep.
owatahfuhlyem (6 days ago)
As a guitarist, I play many gigs. Recently I was asked by a funeral director to play at a graveside service for a homeless man. He had no family or friends, so the service was to be at a pauper’s cemetery in the back country. As I was not familiar with the backwoods, I got lost. I finally arrived an hour late and saw the funeral guy had evidently gone and the hearse was nowhere in sight. There were only the diggers and crew left and they were eating lunch. I felt badly and apologized to the men for being late. I went to the side of the grave and looked down and the vault lid was already in place. I didn’t know what else to do, so I started to play. The workers put down their lunches and began to gather around. I played out my heart and soul for this man with no family and friends. I played like I’ve never played before for this homeless man. And as I played ‘Amazing Grace,’ the workers began to cry. They cried, I cried, we all cried together. When I finished I packed up my guitar and started for my car. Though my head hung low, my heart was full. As I opened the door to my car, I heard one of the workers say, “I never seen nothin’ like that before and I’ve been putting in septic tanks for twenty years.” Apparently, I was still lost.
Kaiih Henson (6 days ago)
funny joke but funnier when Quinton Tarantino told it in the film Desperado starring Antonio Bandares.
Kaiih Henson (6 days ago)
Jack Hack. your right it was a barman.
Jack Hack (6 days ago)
I heard it about that same time, but it was a bartender joke back then.
Glyne Martin (6 days ago)
One morning this blonde walks into a building. Kinda funny 'cause... You would think that she would've actually seen the building....
jappa Kneads (6 days ago)
Guy takes his dog to the movies. As he took his seat and the movie began, the guy sitting next to him was dumbfounded that the dog seemed to understand the finer points of the movie. The dog seemed to cry, laugh, get angry and was ecstatic at the points in the movie that called for those emotions. When the movie ended, the dog gave it a literal standing ovation. As the guy and his dog were leaving, unable to help himself, the onlooker rushed up to both the guy and the dog and addressed the guy and said: _"Sir!...i have never in my life seen such. Your dog just amazed me to no end...i have NEVER seen a dog obviously enjoy a movie the way your dog did!"_ To his surprise, the owner of the dog said: _"Well yeah...he kinda REALLY surprised me too!"_ The onlooker asked: _"..but why should your own dog surprise YOU of all people??"_ The owner replied: *_"He absolutely hated the book!"_*
James Shaffer (6 days ago)
My father told me that joke in 1980
Gr8mom56 (6 days ago)
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Matias (6 days ago)
There was a guy who couldn’t afford a ferrari so he finds a store which sells fast cars , but to get the car running he needed to talk shit to the car and to stop it , he needed to stay names of fruit. So he takes the car out and says “ you are a shitty car , fuck you...” the car gets speedy , there is a turn ahead so he starts “ bannana, apple, mango” so the car slows down. Then he starts again “fuck you , shittiest car ever” and he sees a cliff ahead and says “ banna apple mango” and the car stops right at the edge and he says “ you shitty car almost killed me”
Albert Cassler (6 days ago)
as old as the hills
Julius Revely (6 days ago)
tht was funny as shit
Myst Ery (6 days ago)
That was a joke from Quentin Tarentino in Despedao (El Mariachi series of movies) told BY Tarentino TO Cheech Marin, the bartender. Good telling of it though, and with a different set up.
Phil K` (6 days ago)
Desperados Copycat.
oldest joke
David Bumbeck (6 days ago)
This guy is far from old. Great Joke, better delivery.. You are a legit story teller.
David Bumbeck (5 days ago)
+Jack Hack your right, I'm an idiot..
Jack Hack (6 days ago)
I think the title referred to the person in the joke. I think.
old fishstick (6 days ago)
there are three men wandering around in the woods all the sudden they are ganged up on by a tribe the tribe ties them up with a fire in the middle they are all chanting and screaming but then all of the sudden it goes quiet and the leader walks into the middle looks down and screams why did he scream the fire was in the middle
Mr. The Mac (7 days ago)
This joke was on desperado told by Quentin Tarantino in the bar scene, except the joke was changed to be about the irs here the original is about a bar bet.
peter wright (7 days ago)
I guess if you're 12 years old he's an old man. Better title would be ' man tells a shit old joke'
Nickplays 2 (7 days ago)
😂😂😂😂
Uncle Darthy (7 days ago)
I loved this joke when it was in the movie Desperado
jack Cannon (7 days ago)
A man walks into a bar that got to hurt 😂😂
Alicen Taylor (7 days ago)
Poop, Shut up, and Maners were driving down the rode when Poop jumped out the window. So Maners went to look for him. While Shut up was driving he got pulled over by a cop the cop said ,"What's your name boy." "Shut up." " Whats you name boy." "Shut up." Finally the cop says, " Where are your maners". Shut up says, " Out in the woods looking for Poop.
Jerry Hibler (7 days ago)
Why do hicks always sound so stupid ?

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